Some people feel that they have a right to say whatever they wish and that it is up to those who have to hear them to work on themselves not to be hurt by what they hear. "It's not what I say to you that causes you pain,' they will say. "Rather, it is the way that you take it. It's your own attitude that is causing you the suffering. Change your attitude and you won't have any problem. Since it's all your fault, I don't need to be careful with what I say to you."
Yes, it is true that a person's subjective evaluation of a statement is what causes them emotional pain. But this does not give anyone the right to insult others and claim that they should develop coping skills. If a person does feel pain, even though theoretically they may be able to become oblivious to the negative statements of others, we need to be careful not to say anything that will cause them that pain. We need to deal with the actual reactions of any given individual.
http://davidfromjerusalem.blogspot.com/
David Orbach plays Flamenco
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8p3nW8IIEdk
Adieu
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h8DMZviO6J0&list=UUqZ_aaluuNxoj4ox5CJ7PnA&index=1&feature=plcp
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